As I sit and reflect on the last four months of my life... two phrases come to my head from popular worship songs, "You make all things work together for my good" and "It is Well." I've sung those songs hundreds of times in my life, but throughout this semester, I've really seen them become true in my life. This was probably the most challenging semester I've ever had, in every way possible.
Relationally, I felt like most of the semester I was walking on eggshells around certain people in my life and I had to ask myself why. Why was I walking on eggshells letting their opinions of me matter so much? So this semester, I lost friendships and people walked out of my life. More people than I thought, and people who I never expected to. God is so faithful though, because for the friendships that were lost, new ones were born. I was talking to my friend Dane yesterday (who by the way is one of those newer friendships placed in my life) and he asked how I was doing with the friendship thing and this was my answer to him, "God is definitely being faithful to my prayers to weed out the people who shouldn't be in my life... and while sometimes it hurts... I know it's for the best." That's really the best way I could have said it. I'm so thankful that God always has a plan for us, and He puts awesome people in our lives to help us along that way, and takes out the ones who will hinder us and hold us back.
Academically, this semester was challenging. I haven't had the best track record with grades but I've gotten myself back on track and ended the semester with the best grades I've had since I started my sophomore year. I sat in the library at the start of finals week to study for my 2 finals and felt so relieved because I didn't have any extra homework to do like I normally do. Hard work pays off, and I am never going back to the feelings of anxiety and stress I had when I wasn't applying myself in my school work.
Physically, this semester was exhausting. I don't know that I've ever come home from a semester more exhausted than I did this semester. I had a nannying position that I loved so much but the girls certainly kept me active and busy... which was good for me. I made a pact to try and walk more on campus this semester instead of driving my car when going to the anvil, and I did that. All of my classes and my apartments were upstairs. Plus I was going to the gym a few times a week. It was a battle to wake up every day, but I did it... and it was all worth it.
At the end of the day, I look back at this semester and I feel a sense of peace. God really did take everything that happened, that the devil meant for evil, and He used it for good. Also, I'm happy.
So to you, if you've read through this whole post... please know that even though you may be going through something so ridiculous right now, God is there with you, and He is turning it for good... even if you may not see it yet.
He loves you and He's with you. Walk with Him, and He will prove faithful to you and guide your steps. You are loved.